After some frantic scrambling to get successfully tranferred from my regular health insurance to COBRA, I was able to have my MRI guided biopsy this morning as originally scheduled.
(If you are ever in the situation of signing up for COBRA, they will tell you that as long as you sign up within 60 days after your regular health insurance ends, you will have continuous coverage and will be reimbursed for any health care expenses during that time. Don't believe it. Send in your check and sign up as soon as possible because for any procedure that requires a pre-authorization they will need a group number and you will not have that until all your paperwork is processed. If you get such a procedure without going through the proper pre-authorization channels, you will not be re-imbursed no matter how necessary or legitimate the procedure was.)
I was deeply anxious this morning. So far, of all the procedures I've gone through, the biopsy and the MRI were the most painful and unpleasant. Today's appointment was a combination of both, and I expected to be absolutely miserable. But I wasn't! Thank god for Valium.
Despite my recent incarnation as a drug pusher, I am suspicious of pharmaceuticals and reluctant to use them. But, I was happy to be doped up today! The 45 minute procedure seemed to take just a few moments, and I have almost no memory of the follow-up mammogram they performed afterwards. And yet, during the visit I still felt in control of my senses and able to function. If you try this at your doctor's office, make sure to bring along someone you really trust and can rely on. (Especially if your procedure involves disrobing.)
My escape from pain and suffering is not the only good news from this morning. Dr. Vernaccia was able to successfully biopsy lump #2. (prayforbenignprayforbenignprayforbenign) This significantly reduces my chances of having to go through more than one surgery!
I still don't know what kind of surgery I'm going to have this friday, but we will know by Wednesday. The choices are down to these two:
1. If lump #2 is DCIS (ductal carcinoma in situ...just like lump #1) I will have a mastectomy and be done with the whole process! (except for shopping for a prothesis...as I have decided against reconstructive surgery.)
2. If lump #2 is benign I will have a lumpectomy. I will get to keep my nipple (!) at least for now. Surgery will be followed by radiation therapy and/or additional surgery depending on how the removed tissue looks.
(Right now I am not even considering choice #3...if lump #2 is malignant AND more advanced stage of cancer. It just seems too unlikely.)
Emotionally I feel like I'm doing pretty good. The most challenging part of this has just been learning to deal with NOT KNOWING what is going to happen next. My flowchart on the previous post was part of my process of trying to deal with that. I'm almost glad to be going through it. It is so obvious that developing a tolerance for uncertainty is a worthwhile excercise that will continue to come in handy for the rest of my life.
The best part of this whole thing is the amazing outpouring of love and letters and gifts and hugs and kindness and alternative medicine and caring and financial assistance and encouragement from all my friends and family.
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