Cancer Is My Piano

I think of the Universe as a living breathing thing that knows what you ought to be doing and will try to clue you in if you get off track. Here is how it works.

When the Universe wants your attention, it sends you signals. It throws tiny little downy feathers and bits of soft moss at you. If you are paying attention, you’ll see them, you’ll feel them! You’ll get the message! Most of us need something more solid. Luckily, the Universe doesn’t give up. It starts throwing little sticks and pebbles. If this doesn’t work, it moves up to branches and rocks. Hard as it is to believe, many of us are weirdly able continue hiking along our life path without even noticing the boulders and tree stumps flying at us from every direction. We duck when we have to but only the truly astute say to themselves, “Gee, there must be a better path out there somewhere, I’m going to try and find it.” For the rest of us, the Universe eventually works itself up to smacking us down with a grand piano.

Getting fired and cancer on the same day was my grand piano. I’ve spent the last 7 weeks totally smacked-down. I think I’m ready to sit up now. I’m not sure where I’m going from here or what I’ll need to sustain me on the journey. I know I’m not going to head off in the same direction I was traveling. I can’t anyway…that stupid piano is in the way!

I don’t know what I’m going to do now for a home or a career. I feel determined not to settle for anything less than what I really really want in my life. I don’t want to play it safe or worry about whether I might fail and disappoint people. For the first time in my life I feel like I know the answer to, “What’s the worst that can happen?” The worst would be if I got cancer again. Since I can’t really control that, I’ve decided to go ahead and try for the life I might have always dreamed of it I’d ever had the courage.


I don’t know what that is yet, but I promise to keep you posted as I figure it out. If you want to help me along the way, please write and tell me about the life you’ve always wanted. I want to know what you dreamed and how you tried to make it come true, or how you didn’t. I want to know how you succeeded and how you failed and what you might have found instead. I need role models for how to reach big dreams! But, I also want to hear from those of you who gave up or failed or didn’t even try. I especially want to hear from other people like me who are only just starting to figure out what their dream-come-true might look like.

I know it can be tricky leaving comments here if you don’t already have the right kind of e-mail or blog account set up. You can also email doublewhammydiary@gmail.com. Just mention this post in the subject heading so I know it’s not spam. I’m sincerely looking forward to hearing from you.